this is a time of togetherness and creation for bird. words, african beats, jungle sounds, jazz history, strong lungs, gentle fingertips on cue, brass tempo, pressure,  shine, shift shaping, hearts cheating, soul- so much soul. my december. my hearts been focused on elevating my appreciation for the desire to share.  i want an infinite palate of blues and purples and golds around. thanks friends & lmk for dancing to my rhythm. blessed holidays.

ps. dont forget to check out REVO and THE BEST KEPT SECRET ,coming to a city near you!

i have modified my line.
deep plum, deep house, and deep left is the movement i am in. oy to lorac, second sundays, and sir barack!
never again do i want to deal with the snaps of having farmers market, debate, and game five of the post- pahlusss mad men delay, in one freakin night. high five tivo. i owe you a bigger tv.

quite recently i met a mistake i should be thankful for.  im not so ready yet.

i questioned my faith. my familiar. all that is most comfortable. doubting myself and my strengths. in my vision of what is the end of this gray matter, i look forward to the holiday. i ask my light, my heart, and hashem for help.

a very dear friend, a new friend told me to be a ghost. bury myself in my work, do all the things i love. remain distracted in design. remain true, the doubt will swim away.

i drove for a while north, to clear some heaviness and create.  togetherness was everywhere, people in twos, couples, happy, busy, having sundays without me. my stomach felt like it had been punched in for hours. my heart is broken, and my mouth so dry. tears seem to roll with no apparent warning and for every reason.  ive never felt this hungry or indifferent. sometimes i wish there was a pill for love to go away.

i feel more like a woman now.

sleep hasnt been easy. it seems my body is absolutely trained. so i dream. mad, colorful, i am in rem. little two- three hours dates with my thoughts.  ive taken on too many projects, its starting to show.   i wish mike & mike was on earlier, i wish the farmers market was closer.  all i seem to crave is peaches & eric satie.  lots and lots of eric satie.

classical-satie 

i took red (my fuji fix) to t.o. over the weekend. cleaned her up, and thom the shop dude hooked us up with some wicked white chains ill be sporting soon.  that cheered me up. we went on a bike ride down westlake to oak park and worked on some music at the pollo loco. me, red, my down tempo shuffle, and a strawberry fosters freeze. it was just enough nature for me. – though, nature in the burbs.. ill admit is fucking square. 

i miss the city.

i feel like that diet coke ad with the girl on her skates dancing to the bubbles of summer sparkle. thats what a coke does, thats what kaskade sings. only, you become that  sparkle- floating up to the sun, looking down on everyones love story.